12 timeless ways to deal with failure

by Derek Potocki on 03/05/2011 · 11 comments

Karma Chameleon

We all know the story. A great sermon, or a powerful self-help book. Anthony Robbins’s super-inspiring workshop. And we inevitably end up with a list of goals in our hand! Oh, The List! Life tastes good.

Until failure happens. And happens it does. With the vengeance. Failure inevitably happens when we have goals. Failure is built into a Goal Achieving Journey.

But we are commandos. We are well prepared! We know what to do, in case the dark tornado of failure strikes and rearranges us to point of atomic annihilation.

We have 12 ways at our disposal to deal with any nasty failure, that comes to steal our goals from us.

Here they are: the 12 ways we use to deal with failure. Don’t laugh. They have been used through ages. They are timeless.

1. Intentional bucket kicker:

This is the end of the world. I need to exit. Where is my gun or the nearest skyscraper?

2. Creative bucket kicker:

Blame someone else for your failure, narrow down your target and hurt or eliminate SOB.

3. Rationalization adventurer:

I didn’t need that thing anyway. I’m happy where I am.

4. Present moment worshipper:

Present moment is all that matters. I don’t need no goal. Achievement will not make me happy.

5. Lazy Boy:

Oh Boy. I set that goal way to high. Let me make it easier and downgrade it a notch.

6. Globalist:

Let me put a nice, big label on myself and stretch it into infinity. From “I just failed” to “I am a failure” to “I am a failure in everything” to “I am a failure all the frickin’ time”. Preferably stretch this attitude to all areas of your life. I call it “going global”:)

7. Genetically modified cyborg:

I am genetically insufficient. I can’t believe that idiot next door has such good genes. He is so successful.

8. Unfaithful Impotent:

I can’t believe this happened to me.

9. Deodorant minimalist:

Don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s all small stuff.

10. Conspiracy Priest:

We are controlled by dark forces, greek gods and illuminati MFs. It’s impossible to succeed.

11. Karma chameleon:

It’s my karma, I must have been bad in my prior incarnation. Incense anyone?

12. Prudent Student:

What can I learn from, what has just happened? How can I use it to get where I want to be, even faster? What’s my next step?

How do you react to inevitable failures on your path? Are you especially fond of becoming Karma Chameleon? Or perhaps you morph into a Genetically Modified Cyborg? I know a few will choose a path of incense burning, Present Moment Worshipper?

PS: 12th way is the only attractive option on this list, IMHO:)

What is your style of dealing with failure?

Please share my post. Tweet it, and share it on Facebook. Comment below, I love comments. Thank you. Love, Derek. And get my free ebook on Goal Achieving Lifestyle here.

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Robert Dempsey
Twitter:
March 6, 2011 at 7:07 AM

Great post Derek. I’m a 12 now, but a number of years ago I would alternate between 6 and 9. It’s easy to buy into the BS that starts to kick in once you don’t hit a goal – I think it has something to do with the environment we’re brought up in – win/lose, the only choices.

After a while you just say f* it let’s keep going and not do that again.
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Derek Potocki
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March 6, 2011 at 7:38 AM

Hey Robert,
Truthfully, throughout my life, I have used all the above. But now I try to focus on only number 12. I think number 1 through 11 are the learned responses, that come from a combination of certain religious beliefs, media newsfeed, and some self-help gurus (environment).
Thanks for stopping,
Derek
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Norma Nelson March 6, 2011 at 4:26 PM

Hey Derek, it’s Norma from work. I’m pretty sure i’m at no. 6 right now and have recently bought 3 different books to try and fix myself. Hopefully i can skip all the other numbers and go straight to 12. lol! Having just turned 45 ( and thank you for your birthday wish) i don’t want to live the rest of my life like i’ve done the last 45 years!

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Derek Potocki
Twitter:
March 6, 2011 at 5:40 PM

Hi Norma,
Thank you for stopping by. The thing is, people use different ways to deal with failure. But “going global” is a thinking error. You can’t take one area of your life or one “failure” and tell yourself something general like “I am a failure”. You are not a failure. There is just an event that happened with unpleasant outcome. That’s how I think.
And yes. The sooner you embrace number 12, the better your life will become. I guarantee it:)
Cheers,
Derek
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Norma Nelson March 7, 2011 at 7:10 AM

Thanks Derek!

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Hajra
Twitter:
May 18, 2011 at 8:05 AM

I go through phases of probably majority of these – blame myself, blame others, maybe destiny’s fault, maybe its all in my genes, I am not worth this, I should shoot someone and that might make me happy, maybe if I break a few things in my house, I am happy, tomorrow I am changing my life, I won’t feel stressed, Breathe, breathe, breathe, shout, shout, scream and then finally…. just gorge on great fatty food and then sleep!

Loved the 12 techniques!
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Derek Potocki
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May 18, 2011 at 7:14 PM

Hi Hajra,
Thank you for your visit and your funny comment. I forgot about fatty food method. Hey, I will make myself fail just to eat fun food:)
Ooops, getting carried away.
Heavy Metal Rock On.
Derek
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QWERTY June 8, 2011 at 3:47 PM

Hi. Ive been through some of these, not necessarily all. The scary thing about failure, i believe, is that it can SHAPE a person for a lifetime, just as equally as success can shape a person’s attitude and life ALL WITHOUT US KNOWING IT! Failure sedates passion!

I believe that failure can subconsciously lead one to think that they can’t do everything; that fate takes more control of our lives than we like. It shapes an attitude of dependence on others, and one that says ‘I dont know’, and ‘I cant’, and ‘It wont happen, dont sweat it’. Passive! :(

Ive always believed that our potential lies in how much we believe in ourselves, and not in intellect and genetically-generated abilities. It’s all about the attitude.

This, is coming from me, I who failed miserably and still struggling to overcome that failure. :(

I would LOVE to read a followup article expanding on point 12.

Thanks :)

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Derek Potocki
Twitter:
June 8, 2011 at 4:55 PM

Hi Qwerty,
You are right, only one big failure can wipe you out forever like a rotten potato. But I will never allow failure to determine my destiny. Failure to me, lasts only one second. What follows it, is up to us. We are makers and creators of our lives. That includes what we do after failure strikes.
We put so much emphasis on teaching people about how to succeed. But not enough is said about how to deal with failure.
My blog is going to change that.
Thank you for your comment. I can sense that you understand this lesson very well.
The final point. Don’t let failure determine your destiny. USE IT as a springboard to new highs!
Love,
Derek
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