How are you doing today? I hope you’re having a blast. In today’s post, I will talk about a concept of self-esteem. Have you ever seen assertive (not aggressive) people in action?
They are able to pull off some amazing ass-kicking stuff that many of us only dream about.
While you’re reading this post, I want you to look at the images of 3 different doors and think about which door would you like to open.
Door 1: “I am a piece of s@#$t, I settle for the least, that life has to offer”.
Door 2: “I am average, the life I live is average. I have average dreams and average friends”.
Door 3: “I never settle. I create what I want in my life. I choose my friends wisely. I choose my actions based on not conformity, but how much impact they have on my destiny”.
Self-esteem is important. Because if you believe , you’re a door mat or second-class citizen, the world around you responds in direct proportion to your esteem of yourself. If you don’t see your own value, nobody else will. Believe me.
If people treat you like piece of s#$%t, it is because you have taught them to do that. The world mirrors your beliefs. And one of the most important beliefs that can take your life to great heights is the belief that you are very valuable.
However, due to some reasons (mostly school and media IMO) majority of people adopt the average level of self-esteem. By doing that, many live generic life. This group is the most common. Their attitudes are easily visible in their conversations and their actions. This group favors fear as a dominant emotion.
People in this group hate risk. They also are very afraid of “what others think”. They will do everything to conform to their surroundings. Independent thinking and acting are rare. The irony here is that people in this group believe that they have OK self-esteem. If your self-esteem is OK so is your life. Generic or template kind of life. Brrr.
3rd door represents a life with very poor self-esteem. People in this category truly believe they are undeserving and unworthy. Therefore they will often engage in self-destructive behaviors. “Why to take care of myself If I’m a piece of s$%^t”. I believe that this category is relatively small in numbers, because it’s kind of extreme to have a very low self-esteem.
The point here is clear. Average, OK type of self-esteem creates an OK type of life. You don’t want to have an average self-esteem level. If you want to have a great life, then above-average self-esteem level has to be created.
Of course the question of the century is: “How do I increase my self-esteem level”?
The answer is not simple but I will give you few ways to do just that.
First of all you’ve got start with your mindset. Your inner game. You’ve got to create a super self-esteem level by thinking not by doing. If you are having hard time taking action and you feel that you live an average life, then you have start your inner work first. Actions will come later. Building a great life with low thoughts about yourself is like driving a car with your emergency brake on!
How do you change your inner game?
- Read only good stuff.
- Use affirmations and visualizations.
- Ask useful questions.
- Cultivate your desire for better life.
- Be curious.
- Learn constantly.
- Develop creativity.
- Pay attention to great people.
- Ignore chicken littles.
- Know how to deal with failure.
When YOU develop your inner game, you will find setting goals easier. And they will become bigger and more challenging.
So perhaps the first goal or direction you should take is to develop a great self-esteem level. Do it first. Then set your goals. Or even better do both at the same time. Set smart goals and work on your self-esteem at the same time.
Self-esteem is not new age or pop psychology. It is real. Ignore it at your own peril. Develop it and watch your life change for the better. Don’t be a door mat. Don’t ever be generic. Be assertive (not aggressive). It’s time to kick ass. Yes YOU:)
Comment, Tweet me, Share me. Do something. I will love you long time;)
PS: To really positively re-arrange your life get my free e-book here.